White Collar
by AutomneArcher
Summary: A series of journal entries by Carlisle Cullen. *Multiple one-shots* I do NOT own anything. Reviews make me smile. :D
1. Shadows Of The Past

Flashes of thunder could be heard from a distance. The promise of rain was in the heavens as the clouds crashed across the sky like raging seas.

A man was standing by his window as he looked outside. A look of familiarity in his sun-gold eyes.

He was standing there perfectly erect, the silhouette of his strong figure gently caressed by the dim sunlight that was sinking in grey cotton.

His fingers were lightly touching the emrald-green silk draperies. His mind lost in some deep corner of the past.

The hum of the rain began as the intricate droplets began sliding on the window pane one by one. He watched as the infinitesimal drop of water slide down and dissipate on the window sill; he was staring at it as if he had seen a thousand moments like this, and was waiting for a thousand more to unfold before his eyes.

There was something esoterically mysterious about this man. His eyes carried in them that look of deep reverie - as if he had already lived a hundred lives and was merely awaiting for a hundred more. Watching the world as it evolves itself, and he looks on unchanged and unscathed by time. Like he was some sort of reincarnation of himself. Like a phoenix dying in the ashes only to be reborn again.

He was clutching a black fountain pen as he walked back towards his oak-wood desk. He sat in the leather chair and stared at an empty page of his diary. The crisp white page was staring right back at him; somehow awaiting the secrets his pen would reveal. The white paper would become his confidant, his friend, his witness.

_The year was 1663._

_The life I came to know was different. The air was fresh and pure, a far cry from the future I have learned to live in._

_The world was young, and time even younger. Even the sun's rays shoned a different light._

_The dark seemed to be a million years away. It was a time steeped in rich history._

_Things were simple and austere. And during those years as I remember them, my eyes were once the colour of the sky._

_From what the remnants of my human memory shows me, it was a sunny day in May._

_But despite the jovial rays of the sun and the sweet enticement of summer; inside the manor it was morose and as sombre as ice._

_My father had scolded me the night before that I needed to be more firmer in my resolve with the tasks he now placed under my care._

_Despite the absence of a more warmer father figure in my life, I knew he was right._

_"This is no frivolous game child. The stakes are life or death, and damnation awaits you if you are ever bitten by those evil creatures. They are the hounds from hell, they must be wiped out completely." He would say._

_My father was slowly becoming weak over time. And the heavy responsibilty of his duty fell into my hands. It was a divine task that I needed to proceed with the utmost care._

_"Must I tell you again William the dangers of leaving certain locations unsearched?" My father exclaimed as he let out a coughing spell._

_We were in his bed chambers._

_The familiar fragile figure in white that rested in the four-poster bed with the maroon eiderdown was there to greet me with an impassive glance. The look in his eyes told me things were far more graver than they seem._

_The afternoon sun was shining away with the shade of burnt tangerine, a significant sign that dusk would soon take its place._

_"Yes father. But I assure you, I did make certain that-"_

_"No you did not!" His voice echoed throughout the room as he raised the brass goblet from his nightstand._

_"We cannot afford such mistakes son. Tis' not your life that will be in danger but all of us here will be at the mercy of those bloodthirsty demons!" He screamed aloud as he slammed the goblet back in its place. The water spilling haphazardly from its mouth, sending little droplets of moisture on the floor._

_"You will have to do it once more tonight and be thorough with it!"_

_I stood there as I watched his wan countenance wrinkle with anger and vexation. "I wouldn't have made the mistakes you have done."_

_I lowered my eyes to the wooden floor - somehow feeling as If I had been struck._

_His face softened for a moment only as he looked at me, "I swear you grow to be like your mother everyday." He exasperated wearily._

_Despite the morbidity of the impending situation. I had to do it._

_I desperately wanted to be the son he deserved. And somehow deep inside I was hoping by some miracle if it was a sucsses he would be proud of me._

_And he would look upon my triumph rather than my failures._

_I did not pretend to be blind to some of his frustrations towards me. There was some inadequacy unknown to me that he kept only to himself._

_My only prayer for him was that he would become the father I so longed for. The father who speaks to his son with a gentle voice and a benevolent heart._

_I hoped that this was the chance to break down the barriers between us. To truly know him as not only a man but, as my father. I wanted to know his thoughts of life; his dreams, his ideals and ambitions for me as his son were._

_The good Lord knows he was the only parent I had left. He was indeed my father but yet I felt as if I had only merely scratched the surface of his true being._

_My father as I remember him was as enigmatic as a puzzle. The more you tried to solve its conundrum, the more the riddle grew. There were still many facets about him that still remained beyond my comprehension as I grew up under his care. He was the leading Pastor in our Church; a charming man of grace and intelligence, and a man of strong faith. He was gracious and well respected. Yet still a side of him was kept hidden in secrecy._

_Perhaps my mother's passing caused him to become bitter in a way. Somehow deep inside I could feel he wanted to shun away from the misery of her death and to become numb. Hoping it was a means of escape till he no longer felt the pain of having to lose somone he loved so dearly._

_There were indeed countless of times when I wanted to know more about her, to know more about the woman who bore me. But I never challenged the fates by asking him such a deep and personal question. I was more fearful of his bark rather than his bite._

_I still remember that evening clearly. The night of my third raid. The first two had been unsuccessful._

_I was merely a young lad at that time. No older than approximately the age of 23. The bloom of youth upon my cheeks and the sun in my hair._

_The dusk had finally descended upon the land. I had spent a large amount of time down in the stables organizing a more proper approach to the raids. The plan needed to be executed with extreme cautiousness and there had to be no fatalities - at least._

_I had managed to discover a coven of vampires hidden in the city sewers several nights ago. They would have had to come in from the River Thames, and then made their way underneath the city through the canals so no one would ever suspect. They needed the dark, an underground fortress to call their own._

_And the London sewers was their home._

_I sat there on the wooden bench by the dim candlelight as I drew a custom-map on a bit of parchment. Carefully and strategically I marked out the danger zones that needed to be searched. I had no intention of allowing a man to enter those marked places unaccompanied._

_I had spent a good deal of two hours working on that single piece of parchment. Agonizing over the plan multiple times till I was pleased with it._

_The sound of silverwear being placed on the old wooden table interrupted my thoughts as I watched our servant retreat back inside the kitchen door. I took a sideways glance and could see there was roasted ham and a large loaf of bread, and next to it was goblet of red wine. I hadn't eaten yet, but the thought of food made me feel sick with anxiety._

_I took in a deep breath and exhaled softly. The scent of hay and moist earth in the air._

_Just then I felt something breathing onto my neck like hot air. I turned and laughed fondly._

_I stood from where I sat and patted the large creature. It was my loyal white steed I had named Kaye._

_He was frightfully large for his age, but had the softest of hearts. I walked over to the table and tore a piece of my bread then gave it to him. He seemed to have nodded in gratitude as he ate it all from my palm in one swift motion._

_From a distance I could hear the faint roar of horses drawing nearer._

_They would be coming soon. The men who would assist me in the raid. Two of them my boyhood friends. Dilion and Edgar._

_Without wasting any moment, I grabbed my saddle that hung on a great iron hook that was located next to the door._

_I then walked over back to my horse as I began strapping it onto his back. I ajusted the girth and found my fingers were slightly trembling in trepidation at the evening beforehand._

_The sound of the horses in the distance grew louder._

_I ajusted my jerkin before donning on my thick cloak over my shoulders; then I placed a chaste kiss on my mother's golden cross before tucking the pendant beneath my clothing. Then finally I slipped on my scabbard that carried my sword._

_I was ready._

_The 6 men on their horses were nearing my stable. I could feel the light echo of the concrete beneath my heels as I lead Kaye and myself out to meet them. I watched them coming to a halt as they lined themseleves in front of me._

_The pale moon was glistening above us as the night city air entered my olfactory._

_"Where to tonight Carlisle?"_

_The speaker to the left who rode on a brown gelding was a red-headed young man named Thomas._

_"Tonight we go to the sewers."_

_"The sewers?" The man at the center of our group interrupted. He was the largest one among us and rode on a great black beast almost twice the size of any of our horses. He was very tall and had a beard that covered half his callous face, there was almost a perpetual furrow in his thick brows as he would speak. And his voice was of a giant. "Have you gone mad Carlisle? We're not going there, do you have any idea how many of those things could be hiding underneath the town? do you know how bloody dangerous it is down there-"_

_I stepped forward raising a hand, "I know what the risks are Allcott. In fact we all do."_

_"If we die Carlisle I swear-"_

_"Enough Allcott!" Snapped a man my age with wavy brown hair to the right. He was riding a female gelding as he rode his horse in front of Allcott, somehow trying to placate him. "Enough, I'm sure our young man Carlisle here has a plan."_

_"You're one to talk Clive. If we become like those fiends, I'll be torturing you for the rest of eternity."_

_Before Clive could even respond, I watched as Alcott manuvered his horse back and abbraisively rode himself past the other memebers a few meters out - turning a sharp corner into the street before disappearing._

_"Don't mind him Carlisle. The man has lost his marbles completely." Said a soft voice by the name of Delton, who had unruly black hair and an easy manner._

_"As if he ever was normal to begin with." Dilion chided as he stifled a hearty laugh._

_"Lads, I don't mean to interrupt this amusing moment of jesting," Said Edgar as he broke into our group, "But I do believe we have a very important matter we have to attend to, so I think it's best we be on our way with it before night sets in any further."_

_"He's right." I said as I took out my map and opened it, "We ride to the main entrance."_

_"Right."_

_"All of you ride ahead. I'll be riding behind. Wait for me at the entrance. Remember no noise and don't light your torches till it's time."_

_I watched them ride off into the distance as I stood there. The sound of hooves pounding against the ground as they began fading away into the darkness._

_I scanned the skies and was somehow baffled at the rainclouds that were starting to engulf the moon._

_An omnious sign of a tempest heading in our path._

_The night was going to be long._

_I climbed atop my horse and with a flick of the reins we darted off together into the night._

_Our destination was to a district of Central London. A part of the London Borough of Southwark. It was situated 1.5 miles east of Charing Cross. And it fronts the River Thames to the north._

_Our mission would start there._

_Even during those earlier times of my human life, the thought of destroying wasn't something I could easily stomach._

_I am a pacifist. And pillage was sacriligious to me._

_My comrades and I rode our way well into the dark of night. And when we arrived there was not a single soul to greet us._

_The streets were barren and the old buildings stood there like foreboding statues._

_Everything was closed and all the houses were locked and boarded up, not even a single candle was in sight. As if all signs of life were now hidden. There was no tounges to disturb the silence. The only sound we heard came from the hooves of our horses against the cobblestones, and even they dared not neigh or sigh._

_Something was there, lurking in the shadows._

_We had gotten off our horses and I watched Thomas lead them to a nearby post as he tied their reins firmly._

_We stood in a circle as we ignited our torches. We were ready to begin._

_I took a deep breath as we walked towards the manhole that was situated at the center of the the main road, not far from a local pub._

_The manhole was rather larger than I expected and obviously it would take more than one man to lift it._

_"So gentlemen, Shall we?" Edgar motioned, giving Delton his torch to hold as he walked forward and crouched low to clasp the wrought iron handle._

_"You can't lift that by yourself, you demented bloke." Barked Allcott, as he emerged from the shadows with his black stallion. A growl in his voice."_

_"Ah, my dear man. So you've decided to rejoin us?" Edgar mused cordially as he waved Allcott over to him._

_I watched as the burly man descend from his horse and head towards the latter._

_"I must say Edgar that your bits of good cheer repulses me." Allcott retorts with a sneer, as he crouches low next to him._

_"Oh, come now lovebirds. Why don't you try to play nice?" Dilion said in a patronizing tone, placing a hand on Allcott's beefy shoulder._

_"Get your bloody hand off of me before I cut it off myself."_

_"Alright mate, no need to get malevolent about it." Dilion said as he backed away in defeat._

_"Alright then chaps," I said stepping up front, "On the count of three, lift."_

_Allcott and Edgar poised themselves on either side as they prepared to haul._

_"1, 2, 3, and lift!"_

_The lid came off easily as they dragged the enormous cover to the side._

_"Heaven have mercy," Delton exclaimed as he stepped away from the dark hole, "What is that stench?"_

_"That my friend is the stench of guts, glory and victory!" Dilion said in jest as he stood next to Delton, a condsiderable sound of mirth escaping from his lips._

_Dilion's smile faded as the foul stench from the black hole wafted into the air around us._

_"The stench from hell." He exclaimed._

_We were all silent for a moment as we stood there. Somehow the gravity of our quest dawning upon each of us suddenly. The warm light from our torches illuminating on our faces._

_There was a flash of lightning as I stared at that black hole. A cold shiver went through me._

_"Carlisle," Thomas said, fear written in his phsiognomy. "Were not really going in there are we?"_

_"You're out of luck mate. We are." Dilion replied as he patted the red-head's quivering shoulder._

_"It isn't exactly a bed of roses isn't it?" Allcott scoffed._

_"Don't be impertinent." Edgar quelled._

_"You accursed brute. Keep your bussiness to yourself." He retorted._

_"Alright lads, let's keep calm now." Clive said as he tried calming a very petulant Allcott._

_I watched as he and Egar stand on either side of the hole, their gazes as sharp as daggers._

_I cleared my throat and unfolded the map in my gloved hands._

_"This is where we are," I pointed to an X on a portion of the parchment as I continued, "These circles are the parts of the sewers that have never been searched before. Delton and Edgar you take the left hand side as we enter. Clive and Allcott you both to the right. Thomas and Dilion will take the opposite route facing West."_

_There was an audible murmur of acknoledgement._

_"What about you?" Thomas asked, puzzled._

_"I'll be fine." I replied waving a hand._

_And I prayed to God I was right._

_We started our descent on a make-shift rackety wooden ladder, and slowly one by one we plunged ourselves into the awaiting darkness with our lighted torches._

_We were sorrounded by nothing but concrete. Our torches barely shedding light into the infinite darkness._

_The splash of murky brown water beneath our boots as we tread past sodden rats and roaches. The putrid scent of mud, dirt and filth in the air. The smell was so incredulous that the scent burned my nostrils. Part of the walls were covered in molds in shades of gray and green. Scattered parcels of decayed food could be found everywhere._

_We made a stop as we came to the center of the sewer. There were several passages leading into seperate parts of the interconnected sewers. This was were we would part. I watched as my fellow men paired groups of twos and go off into their appointed destinations._

_"You sure, you will be alright Carlisle?" Thomas asked, his words muffled by the cloak he covered over his mouth._

_"Yes, I'm sure." I replied. And I watched him disappear together with Dilion. The light from their torches slowly fading away. A bated smile on his lips as he waved goodbye._

_I never even knew as I stood there - that would be the last I would see any of them alive again._

_I turned on my heel and continued on the task ahead. I was alone this time. Nothing but the sound of scurrying rats passing by me as they came to chew on bits of rotten fruit; insects crawling on the damp walls as they fluttered about - only to be devoured by ravenous lizards._

_I was walking in silence for a few long minutes. The sound of rodents slowly disappearing in the distance. The only thing I could hear was a dripping noise from the ceiling. I stopped for a moment as I listened, above me I could faintly hear the masked outcry of thunder in the skies followed by the downpour of rain. Then I heard something else. A scream perhaps but I wasn't sure._

_I continued to move on, It was not till much later that I didn't realize I was walking in unfamiliar territory._

_I pulled out my map and scanned all areas that I've marked._

_There was an unknown area that I've managed to leave out unmarked._

_And I was already in it._

_Suddenly everything had gone silent._

_Then I hear screams. Violent screams._

_Almost like the screech of a banshee in my ears as I run out of the unmarked territory. The stench in the water was already unbearable as I continued to run in the direction of the voices - never even realizing I had dropped my map whilst I ran._

_I stopped halfway and listened. The screaming stopped._

_An eerie gust of wind was in the air. A chill that ran so deep it went straight to my bones as I stood there._

_"Edgar? Dilion?" I called out, hoping desperately to be comforted by their voices. But there was none._

_In the deep silence I could hear something trickling into the water. I shoned my torch down to my boots and could see a stream of blood._

_A vivid shade of velvet crimson against the brown water._

_I quickly followed the trail of blood and once I found it's source, I stood frozen._

_There lying to the side, limp and lifeless was Allcott. His head was turned to the side in a horrible rictus, his eyes closed. His throat was bloodied and cut open._

_I felt as if I was falling from where I stood. Before I could even reach him I felt a movement past the corner of my eye followed by a scream that echoed throughout the whole sewer._

_"Carlisle! Carlisle help me!" I looked to my right and saw Thomas being carried by something that was hiding in the shadows._

_"Thomas!" I screamed as I ran towards him, "I'm coming, hang on!" The creature was incredibly fast and I could barely keep up with them._

_"Carlisle please, I don't want to die. . ." Thomas cried out, his eyes filled with cold fear._

_I felt helpless as I chased after them, but I knew I had to save my friend. I drawed out my sword as I gained speed._

_After a minute of running they suddenly disappeared._

_I was standing in another part of the sewers. The air was colder there. The air stagnated. There was moss growing on the walls and black molds._

_"Thomas?" I softly called out. I was gripping my sword tightly as I scanned the walls and ceilings._

_I stopped. I could hear whimpering._

_There was a turn at the corner and I took in a breath._

_"Thomas are you alright?" I called out._

_As I made my turn I could see a shrouded figure in gray - It's back facing towards me. My heart skipped a beat._

_"Thomas is that you?" I could see the figure nodding. I couldn't see its face, I walked closer, "Are you alright?"_

_I halted in mid-step. Approximately 5 feet away from the figure. I could see blood stains on its cloth, I swallowed hard and raised my sword._

_"Carlisle. . ." A voice so weak and fragile spoke from the darkness. I veered the torch to the left._

_I could barely see his face. But I knew from that red hair it was Thomas. He was lying in a pool of his own blood._

_"Thomas-" I could barely recognize my own voice as panic slowly crept it's way onto my spine._

_He raised a bloody hand and before he could even point, I knew._

_I didn't even get a chance to turn and take a glance when the torch fell from my hands, its light submerging in the stale water._

_Everything was pitch black._

_I could feel a strong pair of hands lifting me off the ground. The stench of blood on its breath._

_I tried valiantly to escape it's clutches but I failed._

_In a flash of a second I was being pinned against the wall. I remember screaming as I tried to raise my sword, trying in desperation to wound it with my weapon to no avail. I screamed so hard I thought my head was going to burst. And before I could take a breath I remember it's teeth sinking into my skin, digging deeper and deeper before the burning sensation started. It's teeth like blades as it bit down firmly - tearing my neck open._

_Somehow my breath was leaving me. I was no longer sure wether the darkness had made me blind or the pain. I could feel my blood gushing onto my clothes._

_I was writhing in pain. In my mind I was begging for it to stop. For the pain to leave me. But it didn't._

_I was choking, gasping for air._

_When it was finished, I remember sliding down from the wall and onto the wet ground. I laid there in huddled spasms for what felt like an eternity. It was not long till I could feel the rodents starting to gather at my feet, the stench from the canals still in my nose. Somehow I wondered why I was still alive._

_The burning in my neck was starting to worsen as I crawled, inches at a time. I Found my way through the darkness - slowly leaning against the wall and slowly stood up. I then dragged myself forward, my mind in a daze._

_I was walking for what seemed like an hour till I stumbled upon something._

_I could remember seeing flashes of lightning. I looked up and saw the hole from which we entered._

_Somehow my heart lightened at the sight of freedom, but then. . ._

_As I looked down, Dilion was lying there. Dead like all the others._

_"Oh God no. Dilion, no." I cried as I knelt beside him. Through the flashes of thunder I could see his eyes were open, "Forgive me, please forgive me." I took off my cloak as I covered his body in it, gently closing his eyes with my thumb._

_I climbed the ladder and began my ascent. Once I was outside the raging storm was out to greet me, I was drenched within minutes. My clothing was ripped, stained with my blood._

_The ground was spinning and I stumbled towards an old bakery shop and began pounding on the door for help. But no matter how hard I shouted, no matter how hard I pounded no one would answer - my words were being whipped away by the wind._

_I was stumbling through the streets like a lost child in the dark. Frightened by the elements._

_I fell to the ground once more. The weight of the tragedy was still in my mind, but then the pain retruned with a tenacious grip; as if my body was on fire yet I could no longer feel the warmth in my hands._

_I propped myself up with my elbow, somehow trying to gather my sanity - and something caught my eye. It was a window of some sort, a window to a cellar._

_I quickly dragged myself towards it and broke the window with my fist. I can still remember how the glass broke into my skin as I dove in feet first before falling to the ground._

_My vision was blurring as I looked around the darkened room. There seemed to be sacks of some sort, potatoes most probably._

_I sunk further onto the ground. I could no longer think as I sat there shaking. All I could think about was the burning, the pain, I couldn't escape it. . ._

_And before I could cry out for help, darkness took over. . ._

**A/N: Hey guys! I'm back with a new fanfic! :) I hope you guys enjoyed this first Chapter. :)This story will be inspired by different aspects of Carlisle's life. And this also will be my first time writing in multiple-oneshots so I hope you guys will like it. :)**

**Please read and review, I LOVE to hear your thoughts and comments. And it makes me insane with happiness to hear from you guys. :D And story suggestions are always welcome!**

**God bless!**


	2. Invitation To Paris Part 1

Winter.

It was early dawn, half past 4 am.

The winds had finally stopped howling. The frozen flakes from the heavens were just beginning their descent. The ethereal twilight was still fervently in place.

He was in his office at the 3rd floor of the Hospital. He was sitting in his black consultation chair; half-open books and several files were scattered around his desk. The room was hushed and silent. The window was open ever so slightly.

He had just finished his rounds 5 hours earlier. And within those hours he attended to 4 surgeries; 10 patients, and a particular patient that was suffering from a violent stomach flu and was in need of round-the-clock observation.

All in all, it was a terribly long night.

He sighed and loosened the knot on his tie, he was reading a patient's file and signed a document.

If he were still human, he would have already succumbed to the fatigue and pressures of being a Doctor. But he didn't - and proverbially he _was_ no longer human.

There were times when the day melted into night and night would become a day in itself. The long hours, the hundreds of people he would meet; both young and old, fearful, and a brave few who were hopeful.

There were those who complained, some who were even demanding and some who were quiet; then there were those people who fell just somewhere in the middle.

But they were all the same. _Human_. And somehow that was what made them beautiful in a way. That same beating heart that tied them all together in that pulsating rhythm called life.

If he were any other Doctor - which he obviously is not, would have easily been infuriated with the stresses that came with being a Physician. He would have been ill-tempered and easily frustrated.

But Carlisle was different. There was almost a mystic patience about him, a silent determination that burned greatly within himself.

He loved helping people. And he most certainly _loved _being a Doctor. But, like all things it came with a price.

There were even days when he would simply just work 48 hours straight without even coming home. And the person he had to sacrifice being away from - was his wife.

_Esme._

But God bless her heart, she understood him and the sacrifices he had to make. For she too had to sacrifice in seeing him leave her bedside every morning.

But either of them couldn't deny how much one missed the other. Especially him. He longed for her, ached for her, and missed her during those long lonely hours of his absence from her company.

Twilight was nearing to an end. And as he sat there thinking of her, a soft smile formed on his lips. He then stretched out his hands to his pocket and pulled out his familiar silver phone and dialed a number.

He pressed the speaker to his ears and listened to the crisp ringing that commenced.

"Hello?" The sweet feminine voice echoed on the other line.

"Hello Darling, Good morning." He replied, pressing the speaker closer to his ears.

"Good morning Sweetheart," She noticed the slight tinge of melancholy in his voice, "Is there anything wrong?"

"No, Esme. I just. . .needed to hear your voice. ." She could hear a slight pause as he took in a breath, his voice sounded painfully intimate, "I miss you."

The wrenching pain in her chest was almost unbearable as she heard those words. She closed her eyes, trying to keep herself intact, "I miss you too Darling," She whispered, "Will you be home soon?"

Carlisle glanced at the clock on his desk, his rounds would begin again at 6 and would thankfully end at 10, "Yes, dear. I"ll be home soon."

His lips were parted once more, somehow a request was formed in his tongue but he couldn't speak it. He didn't want to sound so. . ._desperate._

__But she knew. She always knew what was in his heart, in his mind, in his spirit. They were like  
two halves of the same soul.

"I love you." She breathed into the receiver.

"Je t'aime." He whispered in reply.

"Hurry home." She said.

"I will." He promised, before the connection went dead.

And that was all he needed. Those three words from her lips, it was frivolous of him to even ponder on the thought that she would not be there to wait for him; when in reality she always would. But just the assurance of her being there, her _love,_ was all he would need to begin the day anew.

A smile was still pressed on his lips as he began stacking papers neatly to one side. Just as he began closing books and clearing his desk, he found his diary open.

It was quite strange. To find something of his so personal and private to be opened just like that. Then he remembered that the night before he had been writing in it. The diary was opened to a particular page; his eyes finding their way through the stream of words, his heart was filled with warmth and his mind began to travel back into the memories that the words carried.

_Pennsylvania._

_Mid-October 1949._

_On a foggy morning in October. Approximately half-past 7. I had received an interesting letter of invitation from a medical colleague of mine to a medical conference in Paris, France. Naturally before responding, I thought it best to discuss the pending matter with my Darling Esme and see what her thoughts were._

_I made my way out of my darkened study room and into the gloomy-lighted hallway. The house was mostly empty around this time for Edward was away at school. So it was Esme and I for most part of the day who were left in the house. Our lovely abode was rather silent for a change. Not even the garrulous chirping of birds could be heard, nor the sweet sound of my love's soft humming in our home. Even the thought of her voice made me long for her terribly, for her company, for her smile and most of all - for her lips._

_I could not find her in our cavernous living room that had a toasty fire jovially burning in the hearth; so I decided to check the master's bedroom. I climbed the stairs eagerly like a an excited school boy as I caught a waft of her familiar scent; I turned a sharp corner and could hear the familiar echo of my heels against the wooden floor ring in my ears._

_I could not mask my disappointment when I found the room empty as a shell._

_Just then I hear the phonograph down below, starting to churn with life. It was playing a song that she would usually have the most pleasure listening to when she would step outside our back porch. It was an old song I first heard in the late 1930s, I believe it was called 'The Very Thought Of You' and my thoughts were indeed of her as I exited the room and made my way down the hall and began my descent down the stairs._

_I was surprised to find the foyer still empty. Despite the music that was playing, I had hoped she would have lingered long enough to have heard me come down. I felt like a dismal lovebird who had lost its mate. Surely the fates were jesting with me. I shook my head fondly at the amusing circumstance beforehand. She was as evasive as a water nymph._

_There was only one place I hadn't looked yet, and that was the outdoor garden._

_Lo and behold as I step out into the porch, there she was, radiant as day and fresh as dew. She was kneeling in the soft ground with her gardening tools as her loving hands tended to her precious plants._

_I felt a pang of frivolous sadness that she had not looked at me yet, but I was more than content to quietly watch her for a while as she tended to her flowers. I was captured, besotted by her beauty._

_She was wearing a delicate turquoise dress that day. And it looked ravishing against her pale skin. She was a sight to behold, the way the fabric of her dress clung to her body as she moved; the way the hem rose ever so lightly as she moved further to pluck out the weeds whilst humming along to the music. A tantalizing smile on her lips that dangerously tempted me to kiss them._

_I leaned on the wooden post, folded my arms against my chest and continued to watch her with a surreptitious smile. My heart threatening to overcome me with rapture as she finally turned to look at me with those little dimples in her cheek._

_I returned her smile as she fondly made her way towards me; tossing her gloves to the side on her way to the porch. Despite the protection from the dirt her gloves offered, her hands still managed to be covered with all sorts of earth and dirt. How or why, I'll never manage to comprehend._

_A delighted grin replaced my smile as she came towards me. She stood gracefully on the very tip of her toes to embrace me as she carefully kept her soil-ridden hands from touching the dark blue sweater I had been wearing; embracing me only by her slender arms and wrist._

_I chuckled lightly at her actions as I wrapped my arms around her waist and whispered, "Darling, It's only dirt. You can easily rinse it off."_

_She shook her head adamantly, a rather saucy glint in her eyes, "No. Dirt on your clothes is unacceptable. You do have a reputation to keep Dr Cullen." She replied with a crooked smirk._

_I shook my head as soft mirth escaped my lips. Then I proceeded to hold her closer as I brushed my lips lightly at the very tip of her nose in a chaste kiss; I could see her lashes close as I moved on to her soft mouth, feeling them grow warm against mine as she returned my kiss. I would have gladly forgotten that I needed to discuss with her that matter of invitation, for her lips were a most delicious distraction till she gently pulled away. I could hear her familiar soft giggles as I moved my lips to her cheeks and kissed them gently repeatedly; I pulled her even more closer by the waist till the tips of our noses lightly brushed against each other. I was determined for our intimate moment to continue._

_"Carlisle, Darling I need to wash my hands inside dear." She said sweetly._

_I purred sadly in her ear. She smiled lovingly at me as she pressed a soft kiss on my lips again, "Please,"_

_I looked into those kind golden eyes and I knew I could not refuse._

_Finally with a little courage, I allowed her to walk past me as I held the door open for her and watched watched her step inside; with me not trailing too far behind._

_I closed the door and stood there for a moment. I watched her meticulous little fingers gently scrub the dirt and soil away, her skin glistening lightly at the vague traces of sunlight from the kitchen window. Looking far more beautiful than Aphrodite herself._

_I walked towards her and leaned myself against the wooden kitchen counter. I was looking at her intently and as always, she never missed a beat._

_"Who was the letter from?" She asked, a knowing smile on her lips._

_I raised my eyebrows in amusment at her precise sharpness. Esme may look as delicate and lovely as a rose, but her intellect can be as sharp as a thorn._

_"Michael Johnson," I said as I watched her dry her hands with a small white cloth._

_"Oh, that Doctor you met from 3 years ago?" Esme asked, turning to look at me shortly after she set the cloth aside._

_"Yes. Apparently he's invited me to a medical conference in Paris, Darling."_

_"Oh." She replied quietly. Somehow her face had an unreadable expression that left me perplexed._

_"Do you really have to go Carlisle?" She asks, her eyes looking mildly saddened._

_I did just only returned from a medical conference in Chicago the month prior, and even though Chicago was not exactly as far as France, the convention lasted for a week._

_"I have to be honest darling, those conferences almost sound like a mandatory obligation. You did just return from Chicago you know, do you really have to leave again?" She exclaims softly, her brows lightly furrowing as she turns to face the kitchen window. Her hands pressed on either side of the sink, her delicate frame outlightned by the grey light. Her shoulders were tensed._

_"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that." She finally says after a fraction of a second._

_I begin to ease away from the kitchen counter as I slowly approached her. I knew she understood very well the demands my work needed, but I also know even though she would never admit it; how sometimes my prolonged absence affects her deeply when I'm away._

_"Would you like me to pack your favorite suit?" She says, changing the subject. Her voice sounding brave, but the emotion behind her voice was clear._

_I was standing behind her as I clasped my arms around her waist and pulled her close till her body was against mine; she closed her eyes as she leaned her head against my chest. I pressed a kiss on her temple, "I'll miss you too much when you leave again," She whispered; her fingers intertwining with mine._

_"And I too, my darling." I replied, my lips finding their way down to her neck as I whispered huskily, "Then come with me to Paris."_

_She veered her head to look at me to make sure she heard me correctly; her honey eyes catching the light from the sun, the weight of my words sinking in as her lips curled into an excited grin._

_I took that as a yes._

_Two hours later. . ._

_"Oh, Carlisle. Paris! I can't believe it. Are you really sure we're going?"_

_I can hear the fervor of girlish delight in her timbre as it echoed from inside the bathroom in our bedroom._

_She was taking bath, the soil from her gardening activity rendered her dress and herself lightly dirty._

_I stood outside the bathroom door clutching a book like a pompous owl and listened to her hum. Even after being married for almost 10 years, I was still too bashful to intrude on her private bathing rituals._

_Though another part of me was ever so tempted to take a curious look._

_"We might go to Paris, if the weather agrees with us." I say, somehow feeling ridiculous at how late my response was._

_"But wait, Carlisle. We can't just leave Edward here, the poor dear might get lonely." Esme said, her voice echoing through the door._

_"You're quite right. But I think he should be alright for a couple of days by himself. Were only staying for the conference after all Darling._

_My mind had been wandering again. How her skin looks as it glistens wetly from the water. The slight tilt in her neck as her head leans back against the tub._

_"Alright sweetheart. Just make sure we're not gone for too long," She said, "I want to know what Paris feels like in the rain." Her voice shakes me out of my thoughts._

_"I don't think there will be any rain Darling, it is October after all." I reply._

_"We might get lucky." She says._

_The room was silent for a long moment, the only sound I could hear was the water coming in from the faucet._

_"Carlisle, why don't you come inside and keep me company?"_

_I swallowed hard and grasped the door handle almost too eagerly. I took a pause and entered._

_There she was. Soaking in a porcelain white tub, surrounded by fluffy bubbles. The scent of jasmines in the air. Her caramel hair was tied up into a large messy bun, the curls twirling about as they dangled around her face and neck. I could faintly see her nubile knees bobbing from beneath the white bubbles._

_She smiled at me as I took a seat on the closed toilet._

_"Darling, don't look so serious. You've seen me like this before." She teased._

_I held back a smile but failed._

_I glanced at her sideways and saw that she was looking at me. That look of fondness, the intimate gleam of affection that her eyes carried whenever she looked at me. Lord bless the man who could ever resist a woman like Esme._

_"Oh dear, I think I've managed to put dirt on your clothes." She said as she stretched out a hand towards me._

_There was an infinitesimal smudge of soil on my collar. I could still feel how her fingers tried to rub out the stain._

_"Tsk. Tsk. This won't do, your just going to have to take it off."_

_My eyes met hers._

_And I knew._

_The afternoon would be deliciously long._

There was a knock on his office door.

The young new intern peeked from behind the door, looking extremely apologetic, "Sir, we need you in room 205."

"Alright, I'll be out in a moment."

He heard the door close as he continued his reading. He chuckled softly as the memory refreshed itself in his mind.

A few moments of silence passed by when a strong gust of wind fought its way into his office.  
The frozen air disturbed the pages of his diary as he stood up and walked across the room to close the window shut.

He proceeded back to his desk and saw that a few of his diary pages were turned by the wind.

_The travel to Paris was much longer than we expected. But neither of us cared. We were both extremely excited to be traveling again after a long while. The drive to the airport was rather at first, calm and uneventful, but later on as we entered the main city of New York; it started to become mildly chaotic, especially when we left the house during the rush hour. But finally after the seas of automobiles parted and the way was clear, we were finally on route to our destination._

_I'll never forget the image of Esme in the passenger's seat - all dressed and bundled up in her travel clothing - the red scarf she wore, the memory in itself still resonates ever so clear in my mind. The rapture of excitement in her eyes as she held those plane tickets between her gloved-hands._

_The flight was a whole different story. The actual traveling time of our flight took exactly: 7 hours and 56 minutes to complete._

_The travel was undoubtedly long but I could have cared less. I realized then as Esme sat next to me on the plane by the window, how much I've missed her presence beside me. The passing month was just crammed with patients and emergency surgeries. I barely had time to sit down and think. But whether or not Esme and I spoke, just the sound of her breathing made me calm and at ease with myself; it was those moments of peace and pure understanding that always reminded me why I fell in love with her - with her soul. And thus those sweet little intimate moments of contented silence between my wife and I, made the eternity we spent together all the more precious._

_I could hear the roar of engines begin to churn with life by the window as the plane reverberated their motions. She sat there as she held my hand tenderly; resting her head against my shoulder, a dreamy sigh escaped her lips as she sunk further into her seat with a book in her other hand. The sound of her soft fingers gently thumbing through its pages. I breathed in her scent as we took off from the ground, the faint but distinct scent of lavender._

**A/N:Hey guys! Sorry for the late update. This week was kinda crazy haha! But anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading part 1 of this one-shot. Please keep reading and reviewing! They make me flyyy :D**

**Stay tuned for part 2!**

**God Bless! 3**


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